Going Nowhere

Our bags and sledges packed and my first cooked breakfast in months. As we were about to head for Iqaluit Airport we were told that our plane had been cancelled due to the blizzard. Apparently, we could probably have taken off okay but the landing would have been tricky. We were holed up in Iqaluit, the capital of Nunavut. The Arctic is unpredictable, we were told, we would just have to sit tight and wait for the storm to pass. Dressed from head to toe in all our layers including Father Christmas outfits we decided to go for 'a little walk' to Frobisher Bay where the huskies hang out. We were told to follow in each other's footprints. I stuck my foot in the snow and it disappeared up to my knee. "Is this sea ice?" someone piped up. "Yup, just go nice and slow." I was walking on sea ice. I had a feeling that I was on the moon - white everywhere and people walking in slow motion in large space suit type outfits. I could barely see as the blizzard worsened. Next minute, our group's leader, David Hemplman-Adams, slipped over and fell flat on his back. I didn't see how this happened as I was too busy trying to concentrate on breathing through a black SAS style face mask. One minute he was walking and the next minute he was lying on the ice. Ouch. He got up before I could blink. "Are you okay?" I asked. "No problem. The funny thing is, I walked all the way to the North Pole and not fallen over once." He shook his head. This walking on ice is going to take some getting used to.

Have You Been This Far North?

After our Last Supper at the Discovery Lodge in Iqaluit, a group returned from a trip across Baffin Island. A tall fit looking man in his twenties asked, "Have you been this far North before?"
"No," I replied. "Well, let me give you a little advice. You will feel strange for at least two days, but stick with it. Once you've got over the first 48 hours you'll be fine. Let you body acclimatise. Don't panic. It will get a lot easier." He looked shattered. His group had endured 80 knot winds, minus 30, and didn't make it all the way across the National Park. After handing over their equipment to us they headed straight for the bar. The moment I saw my red sledge ouitside my bedroom door reality hit. Then came the sleeping bag, the skiis, the ski poles, the blow up mattress, the crampons...What was I doing? Another member of their team appeared outside our door. "Oh, yes, you should know there's a bear den in the Owl Valley." I laughed nervously. "Very funny," I said. "Are you taking a firearm?" he asked.

Arctic Fox

The mission on arrival was to buy some fur to sew onto our windproof jackets to protect our faces. After two planes in 24 hours I was feeling jaded and asked my brother to pop into town for me. The fact it looked like a blizzard was blowing had just a little to do with my decision plus the desire to preserve some energy for our expedition. Johnny returned red-faced. It turned out he had a severe allergic reaction to Arctic Fox. The moment he touched it he struggled to breathe and his face started to puff up. How was he to know he was allergic to Arctic Fox? Another member of the team kindly purchased a strip of white fur for me which I promised to keep well away from Johnny. The fact he and I are meant to be sharing a tent may pose a small problem. I will have to keep the fur well away from him as emergency services will not be easy to get hold of where we are going. That evening I sewed the fur around the hood of my red windproof jacket. As several member of the team have the same red windproofs it looks like we are attending a Fr Christmas Convention rather than going on a big league expedition.

Ice Cloud Fusion

On the flight from Ottawa to Iqaluit, Leanne bagged the window seat.
"Look, Louise, it's hard to tell the difference between the cloud and the ice now."
I peered out of the window to see clouds drifting down onto a mosaic of ice, clear blue sky above.
Nigel B piped up, "That is a lot of white. It doesn't look like the Pennine Way!" Nigel looked concerned. He admitted he hadn't been skiing before and hates the cold.
The previous night, while my fit room mate Susanna, told stories about her trips to the North Pole and Baffin Island, I felt a knot twist in my stomach. I worked out that the last time I had been skiing was ten years earlier in a rather swish French resort. As we walked out of Iqaluit airport it looked like we had landed in no man's land. This was no French ski resort. All I could make out were what looked like aluminium shacks. I took a deep breath. "I like the taste of the air," I said, trying not to slip on the ice. A sign for a shop caught my eye: Fantasy Parlour. I guess when it's this cold and remote people need to have fantasies.

Look Out it's an Ice Pack

As we approached Ottawa on the plane I looked out of the window like an excited little child. Blue skies stretching into the distance. I could hear Joni Mitchell singing 'Oh Canada' in my head. And there in the distance - 'My God,' I said. 'Look, Leanne, look at the pack ice!' I was jumping off my seat. Leanne peered out of the window, squinted, and turned to me, 'Louise, that's a big cloud!' She was right. I looked again and could make out the puffy clouds. I can only put this down to the fact that I've been reading so much about the Arctic that my brain is now filled with images of ice. However, this morning, we fly to Iqaluit and I'm pretty sure we will be flying over lots of ice. I can't wait...

Are You Hunting?

We arrived in Ottawa where we were met by some stern faced immigration officials. My brother, Johnny, was asked if he was giong hunting on Baffin. Admittedly, Johnny was dressed head to toe in black and looked like a member of the SAS. However, he wasn't the only member of our team to be interrogated about the purpose of his trip. Leanne was also asked the same question and taken to a room to be questioned further. We were also asked if we had packed any food! All our bags were weighed down with the contents of our munchy bags! We couldn't pack any more food if we had tried. Luckily, none of it was fresh so we were fine. If the chocolate police had been onto us then it would have been another story altogether.

Bound for Baffin

Today, I leave for Baffin. After all the preparations the day has arrived. Thank you to everyone who has wished me luck on my big adventure. This morning, half-asleep, rummaging through my post, I found a card from my older brother, Gordon, which said: "Obstacles are those frightful things you see when you take your mind off your Goals." It was the perfect card to read at that moment. I had just found two informational sheets from the British Mountaineering Council - one on frostbite and the other on sun/wind protection.
I tried my Lady Jane last night - and it worked! I know it will be harder to pee into a bottle in a tent when I'm cold but, hey, I must keep my eye on the goal and not the obstacle!
I still have a few things to pack and the children's lunchboxes to make...then I will be leaving. I will try to blog when I'm away but it may be very hard as we can not use mobile phones across Baffin Island. I promise to report back in detail on my return. My friend, Alice, suggested I buy a tinted lipstick with sun protection at Heathrow as she thought it would do Arctic Belle some good while trudging across the ice. Nothing like a decent lippy to keep your spirits up. So, farewell my friends - off to the Arctic I go.

Warmest Jacket In The World

I thought I ought to try on kit the night before I depart for the Arctic just to check that it fits. I got into a right sweat! So many layers I lost count. For the finale I put on the Gold puffa jacket and red all in one windproof. Picture the Michelin Man times three. I tried to walk but nearly tripped over. Lara took one look at me and rolled her eyes. 'How embarrassing!' she said.
'Mortifying!' Joe added. It was the first time I had heard him use the word. Once I'd managed to get it all off without any tears, I looked up the details for the puffa or expedition jacket. 'Down filled double construction jacket with box outer wall and a stitch through baffled inner. The Pertex Endurance outer gives weatherproof protection.' Now, that is excellent, I thought. Just what I need. Weather protection. I continued reading: 'Probably the warmest jacket available in the world today...this highly specified jacket has what it takes to provide elemental protection for the most extreme conditions.' So, for all those concerned about my kit please rest assured that I am well kitted out. I now have four pairs of gloves, three or four hats, loads of Hally Hansen thermals and fleeces. I've even got a balaclava. I will look ridiculous but I'm not off on a fashion assignment, this is an Arctic expedition. However, if any fashion designers would like to give me a makeover on my return then that would be marvellous. After wearing all this kit for ten days I think I will need a bit of a boost on the self-image front. I have been told I will lose weight as we will be burning up 6000 calaories a day. For every pound lost I, and my fellow travellers, will donate £10 to the Mitchemp Trust. They could be in for a windfall.

Rock Solid

My brother suggested I pop my Facial Cleansing Wipes and Feminine Wipes (don't ask) in the freezer overnight. Bearing in mind the temperature in the freezer (minus 18) isn't as cold as where we are heading (minus 30) this was a rather handy hint. I have just pulled out the Wipes and attempted to open both packs. Rock Solid. Can I try and pull a single wipe out of either pack? No. I bashed the pack against the wooden kitchen surface. Just like a block of ice. My brother said that I would be wearing four pairs of gloves in the Arctic so if I couldn't do it with my bare hands then what hope had I? I told him that I had just bought some baby wipes (two for the price of one) so I'd pop one pack of those in the freezer. I pray I will be able to use them. My brother has also asked if I have practised using my portable pee bottle - the Lady Jane and Little John? I have kept meaning to try them but, somehow, more important things keep cropping up, like buying more chocolate and heat warmers in the event of any muscle strain. He pointed out that it was a High Priority for me to check out my Lady Jane and advised me to try it at my earliest convenience. I guess I better give it a go. My daughter was not impressed with the Lady Jane and gave me that look which said, 'I wish I had a normal Mum!'

Arctic Hare

We are likely to spot Arctic Hare bobbing around on Baffin Island which will be rather good with Easter just around the corner. However, while I would like to see a white hare dashing across the ice I am rather more concerned as to the state of my own hair. For those interested in the nitty gritty details of Arctic life then I need to be truthful and say that I will not be able to wash my hair for at least 10 days. I have washed my hair every morning for as long as I can remember so this will be a tall order. While we are on the subject of washing then I ought to add that I will not be able to wash my body for the same amount of time. At present, I have a shower every morning. The hair issue has thrown up quite a few oddities. My hairdresser suggested I wear a turban, apparently all the rage this spring/summer. Even Madonna has launched her own range. Another friend mentioned the possibility of getting my hair braided prior to the trip to avoid the embarrasmment of greasy lanks. Another reminded me of that disgusting dried shampoo which I used as a student. Hmmm. Not a good look. The good news is I have bought three hats! One Windy Took - described as waterproof, windproof, breathable. One Hot Took - Windproof and Breathable and one Mountain Cap - Fleece lining with a Peak. Not only are these hats very comfortable and warm, they will also cover up all greasy strands. In reality, I imagine lanky hair is the least of my worries and that everyone else will be too self-absorbed to notice any bad hair days. Let's be honest. Every day will be a bad hair day. I had thought about getting it all cut off but I didn't have the courage. Even I acknowledge that one shouldn't go bald in the Arctic. Brrrr...

Maternal Meltdown

Just three days to go and I have been busy working out the itinerary. Not mine, but the kids. I have written a long list outlining where they are meant to be, at what time and who will be looking after them. This is complicated by factors such as drama shows, swimming lessons, cubs, tennis etc. How can two children do so much in so few days? At least they will be so busy they won't have too much time to think about me. I hope. When I mentioned to Lara's teacher that I was off to the Arctic next week he looked at me as if to say, 'No problem, she'll be fine!' The good thing about Lara's teacher is he is a champion snowboarder, or so she tells me, so he has an affinity with snow. Meanwhile, for Mother's Day, my five year-old, Joe, dictated a poignant card saying how much he'd miss me while I'm on 'my trip' and that he wanted to give me a present to show how much he loved me. He also said he'd take a photo of me when he goes on holiday and look at it when he's sad. I have asked Lara to do a Diary from Dubai while I'm writing mine in the Arctic so we can compare them when we get back. I started off by saying, I'll be writing something like, 'I'm in the tent and there is ice inside. I've walked a long way today and fancy a cup of tea.' She said, 'Mum, you need to give more detail!' She is a hard taskmaster. I didn't want to say, 'I can't feel my little toe and think I've got frostbite. I wish I was sat in front of a lovely log fire, toasting marshmallows!' I imagine when you are in the High Arctic and its minus 30 or so you start to fantastise about such things - but I shall keep you posted. One thing I have been fantasting about is a Hot Water Bottle...

Munchy Bags

I've been out shopping for the contents of my Munchy Bags. For those who don't know, a Munchy Bag is what we munch on during each day of the trek. Every hour, we stop, dip into our Munchy Bags, scoff as much as we want, and then move on. So, what do you put in your MB? Firstly, it has to be highly calorific and secondly, very tasty. It must also weigh about 500 gms. That's a lot of food! I wasn't sure where to shop. M & S? Treat myself to their lovely goodies. A health food shop or adventure specialist? In the end, I found my eyes drawn to a health food type shop with a Clearance Sale advertising 'Everything Half Price'. I grabbed a basket and found myself going ever so slightly mad. I bought the following: roasted and salted cashew nuts (500g); sunset mix (500g); salty rice cookies (175g x 2 packs); crystallised fruit mix (500g); milk chocolate coated brazil nuts (400g x 2 packs); honey roasted peanuts (250g x 2 packs); macadamias, raisins & cranberries (250g). The basket was overflowing and my back was beginning to ache. The woman at the check out looked at me as if I suffered from an eating disorder. I suspect she thought I was bulimic as I certainly don't look anorexic. When I got home I realised that I had not bought enough. Luckily, my friends came round in the evening with loads of food including a chocolate brandy cream cake which was home made and deliciously calorific. It is all a question of eating as many calories as possible. I do realise this but, when you've been brought up to count calories in a diet ridden age it's quite hard to change the habit of a life time. I've got just five days to bulk up and I'm going to do my best, I promise. For once, I'm not going to count how many calories are in a chocolate bar, I'm simply going to enjoy it. How wonderful is that!

Polar Bear Alert

It's only one week to go now. Today, I woke up thinking, or rather, worrying, about Polar Bears. We have been told by the organiser that we are unlikely to see any Polar Bears in the Auyuittuq National Park but, being the investigative journalist that I am, I have been doing some research. Firstly, I decided to call the Hunters' Association in Pangnirtung (our destination) and spoke to a very nice hunter who told me that they had shot a Polar Bear the day before. I was, infact, calling the Association to find out how Climate Change had affected their lives but he just dropped into his answer this little bombshell about the Polar Bear. I then asked him how cold it was and he said -30, colder than last year. I definitely need to find some thermal knickers. I'm sure I was told it would only be - 10! Despite the cold, I carried on with my research into Polar Bears. I found an old story about a group who went to Baffin Island and were warned that there was a Polar Bear roaming around the Auyuittuq National Park. They were advised to sleep in huts in the park which are located every ten miles or so. They didn't get to meet the Polar Bear but they did get so cold they couldn't even wee outside. Instead, they used their rehydrated food bags to wee in. In the morning they woke to a bag of frozen urine. Thank God I've got my Little John and Lady Jane pee bottles! I bought a lovely DVD starring that handsome chap, Ewan McGregor, all about Polar Bears. Some people watch romantic comedies at night. It just shows how much this forthcoming trip is affecting me. Next, I will report on what I need to do if I do encounter a Polar Bear. Thanks to Ray Mears I am reading up on the best tactics. My natural instint may be to run but I have a sneaking suspicion I may just freeze.

Bridget Jones Knickers and Knockers

I worked hard all day and ate as much chocolate as I could manage in preparation for my trip to Baffin. Just over a week to go so thought I ought to up the calories. By several thousand! It got to that point in the afternoon when I could take no more and decided I had to confront the big knicker issue. I have most of the kit but when it comes to thermal underwear I am sorely lacking. I didn't want to ask the alpha males going on the trip. 'What knickers should I take?' From the sounds of it the men wear one pair of pants for ten days. They say this is something to do with 'saving weight'. Anyway, I had heard that such things as thermal knickers and bras exist. I head into town and found myself roaming around the lingerie section of John Lewis. Now, as we all know, John lewis is a reputable department store with a large lingerie department. But do they stock thermal underwear? No. "We have thermal vests," the sales lady said. "But have you any thermal knickers?" I asked. She looked at me as if I was mad. I couldn't face saying I was off to the Arctic so I lied and said I was going skiing. "I'm sure you'll be okay in these cotton ones," she pointed to a very large pair of cotton panties. It's all very well for a sales assistant to say they think you'll be okay, but it's another matter if you freeze your butt. They were large, very large. I thought of Bridget Jones and that maybe it would be better to take one pair, like the men, than nothing at all. I put them in my basket. "Do you stock thermal bras?" I asked. "No, I'm sorry, we've got thermal vests and long johns but that's it. How about a Shock Absorber?" She held up a very large sports bra. "They are very supportive and as they are cotton they are good in the cold."
Hmm. I need a thermal bra, not just because it's cold, but because it's freezing. Minus 30. However, this Shock Absorber looled like it would cover all my chest - and more - so maybe this was better than nothing. The sales assistant came into the cubicle with me and played around with the straps. " It's a perfect fit, madam." I looked at myself in the mirror and nearly cried. It was so ... big ... and ugly. "It will give great support," she said with a smile on her face. Well, there's one thing I need in the Arctic and that's SUPPORT. I popped two Shock Absorbers into the basket and made my way to the checkout, passing all the pretty lingerie on the way. Now I know just how Bridget Jones must have felt.

Little John

Today, the postman delivered a special package: two Little Johns. Nothing saucy. These are portable urinals which were recommended we take on our trip across Baffin. They are red plastic bottles with a lid, ideal for male arctic explorers, who get caught short in the middle of the night in their cosy tents and don't fancy nipping outside in minus 40.
I had already ordered two Lady Jane's - the 'female adaptor' that goes on top of the Little John. but quickly discovered that a Lady Jane is useless without a Little John. Now I have two of each, one set for myself and another set for a fellow female traveller. I have been advised to practise using my Little John and Lady Jane before I go but think I'll give it a miss. Thereagain, if I miss my Lane Jane in my sleeping bag in the middle of the night it will be no laughing matter.
To cheer myself up, I checked today's temperatures on Baffin. If it's not too cold then maybe I'll nip out of the tent in my thermals and relieve myself. Perhaps I can even enjoy staring up at the stars? After clicking on the weather information, I don't think star gazing will be an option. The temperature in Qikiqtarjuaq (where we are heading) is minus 18, windchill minus 32, blizzards forecast. Brrrrr.

Chilly Chops

From tomorrow, I will be able to say 'I'm going to the Arctic next week!' Only ten days to go before I pack my bags, say farewell to my two children and head for Baffin Island. Today, Mothers Day, I have been spoilt with a delicious Sunday Roast and trifle at my Mum's. In the Arctic I will be surviving on strange dried foods. God help me. Why am I doing it? Climate change? Stunning scenery? Who knows. We've been warned that the weather in the UK will turn nasty this week thanks to Arctic winds. Today, I went for a walk and was battered by hailstorms. My fingers went yellow and nose nearly dropped off. But it's minus 30 on Baffin Island right now - which means my fingers will become ice pops in seconds. Hey ho. It's all a very big adventure. And if I get to see one just Arctic Hare, or, dare I say it, a Polar Bear, it will all have been worth it. I think...

Arctic versus Dubai

My husband is a tad surprised about my Arctic assignment but comes round to the idea when he knows a) my big brother will be there to protect me and b) that I can sort childcare out. The first week the children will be at school and the second week is the beginning of the Easter holidays. Within 48 hours he has booked a 5 star holiday for him and the kids to Dubai where he has some business interests. Joe is so excited he packs his bag immediately. I decide it’s time to tell Lara that while she is in sunny Dubai I will be in the Arctic. She has watched a children’s programme called ‘Arctic Diaries’ and her reaction is cool. Very cool. Later, I ask if she is okay, wondering whether she’ll say she might miss me.
Lara has strawberry blonde hair and pale skin. “I’m worried I’ll get too hot in Dubai and you’ll be too cold in the Arctic. Your fingers go yellow when we go out in Kingston. What will happen to them when you’re in the Arctic?”
Lara is a bright child. I try to reassure her. Later that evening I check out the temperatures of our respective destinations:

Dubai: 30 degrees plus
Baffin Island: minus 30

I was going to wait until nearer the time to tell Joe but, somehow, the news gets out. I try to excite him by showing him a picture of a polar bear.
“Will it be very cold Mummy?” he asks.
“Yes, but I’ll be wrapped up warm.”
“Are you going to die?” he asks, puppy dog eyes looking up at me.

Fit and Unfit

In one of those weird twists of fate my older brother, Johnny, a senior police officer, decides to sign up for the trip. He is very fit, goes skiing regularly, and is always entering running competitions like The Great North Run and The London Marathon. When I mention to Johnny I’ve been invited on the trip he thinks it’s ‘a great opportunity’. Like everyone else, he says I’ll have to ‘Bulk up’. If anyone says that to me again I will tell them to ‘Shut Up’ but, I guess, he’s just thinking of my welfare.
However, he is not so sure quite what our parents will think. “Fifty per cent of their offspring will be in the Arctic!” he laughs.
Luckily, I have another brother and sister in Britain where I have just heard we are on high security alert.
“Johnny, given all your experience in the force, do you really think it’s more dangerous where we’re going than staying in Britain?”
He has dealt with a few nasty murders and hit men cases in his time.
He shakes his head.
“The dangers will be very different where we’re going.”
At least he can bring my Ashes back.
Our parents, meanwhile, have had a dispute over whether we are travelling to the Arctic or Antarctic. My mother, a former nurse, has her own tip for me. “You should start taking some Complan to build yourself up.”
Like a good daughter I dutifully check out some Complan products and discover that their ‘Shakes’ are for ‘patients at risk of disease related malnutrition’.

Mixed Reactions

Once I make the decision to go I am met with a bizarre mix of responses.
The most alarming is stunned silence. The temperature in the room drops to below zero when I explain to family friends that I’m going to the Arctic. People look at me as if I’m mad. I might just as well have said I’m going to Mars.
“Why are you going?” one asks.
“I’ll be on assignment,” I explain. One raises his eyebrow and laughs. I find this offensive and quickly change the subject. “So, where are you off to on your holiday this Easter?” I ask.
When I tell my girlfriend on the phone that I’ll be dragging a sledge for ten hours a day there is a long pause.
“I don’t mean to be rude, but are you sure you’re up to it?” she asks.
“I’ve started training.”
“What are you doing then?” she asks.
“Going for walks in Richmond Park.”
“Walks? Don’t you need to do a little more than that?”
“Not at the moment. I’ve been told to start off by walking in the park.”
“Don’t you need to go down the gym?”
I hate gyms. I am a member of a gym but haven’t entered the fitness section since, well, I can’t remember. I do go swimming, though.
My friend persists in her questioning about my polar challenge.
“How many days did you say you were walking across snow for?
“Eleven”
“Eleven?” she screams. “You’ll lose loads of weight, but you haven’t got much to lose.”
“Well, I have been told to ‘bulk up’.”
“Yes, you should tuck into some full English breakfasts. Eat lots of pasta. How’s your back?”
This is a sore point – one I wished to avoid. I was diagnosed with a tilted pelvis several months ago after intermittent pain in my left hip. However, a firm-handed German osteopath tilted it back and now it’s back to normal.
“It’s great, no problem.”
“Yeah, but didn’t you say something about dragging a sledge?”
“It won’t weigh more than the children and I’ve been carrying them around for ten years!” Joe weighs three and a half stone and he’s often jumping on me – hence the titled pelvis.
She sounds unconvinced and before I know it the subject turns to where I’d like my Ashes scattered.

Polar Positives

So why go on an Arctic Adventure?
Satisfaction – I’m told you feel great satisfaction from joining the ‘Big Boys’ League of Expeditions’. To be honest, I’d be pleased if I managed to walk an hour a day - without a sledge. But it takes all sorts. Mainly Alpha Males, I imagine.
The Menopause – Let me make it clear, I am not approaching the menopause (I am only 41). But when men reach a certain age they desire to do something different with their lives. Some buy motorbikes, some choose expensive cars, some date younger women. Others escape to the wilderness. There are nine men and four women going on this trip. Sounds like there will be a lot of hormones flying around.
Losing Weight – I am told that I will lose between 7lbs and 10 lbs. Although I’m not fat I would be thrilled to lose half a stone. What woman wouldn’t? And what good timing. The mini is back in vogue this Spring and I will return in time to sport toned thighs. I’m not sure whether a woman over 40 should wear a mini but, at least, I’ll feel happy to wear a skirt (after a leg wax, pedicure and holiday in sunny climes, of course)
Eat What You Want – Trekkers prepare a ‘munchy bag’ for each day. This contains favourite energy giving calorific foods. In short, you can eat as much chocolate as you want without getting fat or feeling guilty. Bliss. Perhaps Weight Watchers should advertise such trips?
No Mobiles – There will be a satellite phone held by the group leader so in the event of any emergencies you can be contacted. I’m never parted from my mobile but imagine it might give my brain cells a break.
Spectacular Scenery - The trip is described as ‘an Arctic wilderness of jagged mountain peaks, deep valleys, steep walled fjords and eternal glacial ice’.
Character Test - ‘We aim to guide you towards becoming the kind of person that every team wants’.

I’m nervous. I will be the novice of the group. The smallest. Shall I go? What’s stopping me? Fear. Being Frozen. Frostbite.

Polar Risks

The research on Climate Change has made me think. Rather than looking on this trip as an SAS style Survival Challenge (Will I, or won’t I, survive the freezing temperatures?) I should perhaps be thinking more in global terms. The University of Toronto is planning a major weather research expedition to Baffin Island in 2007.
Instead of reading about Climate Change from the comfort of my own home, I should be looking on this trip as an opportunity to find out how the local communities are coping. The idea of doing interviews and gathering data from the research station appeals. But I can’t do this if I’m frozen cold trying to drag a sledge across a non-populated area such as Auyuittuk National Park. I have be realistic.
I suspect my best chance of talking to the locals will be at the beginning - before I’ve embarked on the biggest physical (and mental) challenge of my life.

Polar Risks include:

· Cold temperatures ie. sub-zero - up to minus 40
· Wind chill factor - ffreezing, inability to move
· Hypothermia - shivering, possible death
· Frostbite and loss of digits - my fingers go yellow when I go for a walk in Richmond Park. What will happen to them in the Arctic?
· Polar bears - I love that cuddly one in Raymond Brigg’s Walking On The Snow, but I don’t like the look of them when they turn nasty
· Thin Ice - Don’t want to die this way
· Bulking Up - Put on weight before the trip – and then not lose it
· Losing too much weight - A girl’s dream. Is this a terrible risk?
· Physical training - going for a walk in Richmond Park and getting attacked by a nutter. Ever since a cyclist was murdered in the park last year I’ve found myself constantly looking behind me to check for weirdoes.
· Catching the Yukon Bug - You love it so much you want to go back

Nature Calls

At least Glastonbury has toilet facilities. In the Arctic, it’s back to nature. You dig a hole in the ice with a shovel, squat and pray you don’t get a frost bitten bum or attacked by a polar bear. All of a sudden, those portaloos seem like luxury.
There is also a device called a ‘pee bottle’ that women are advised to buy in order to wee in it in their sleeping bag at night. This avoids freezing outside at some unearthly hour. But what happens if you miss the bottle?

Before I dismiss the trip as a ludicrous idea I do some research. I’m sure that for many people the opportunity to go to the Arctic is a ‘Trip of a Lifetime’.
I have read all about Climate Change and the disappearing sea ice. This might well be my only opportunity to go to the Arctic. Shouldn’t I grab it?
The Arctic is certainly not high on my list of family holiday destinations. For the past nine years every Easter we have gone to stay near Dartmouth in Devon. I’m not sure what reaction I’d get if I said, ‘Change of plan this year. Fancy trekking 120 miles across ice this Easter?’

I google Baffin Island and here are some of the key facts I discover:

The island is one of several Arctic ‘hot spots’ . This is an area where the temperature has risen, on average, a degree Celcius per decade.
Sea ice is disappearing from the waters around Baffin Island nearly four times as fast as the rest of the Arctic.
Canadian activist Sheila Watt-Cloutier, from Iqaluit, Baffin Island, has just been nominated for a Nobel Peace Prize for raising awareness about global warming and how it affects the local Inuit population. She puts a human face on the devastation being wrought by global warming. She said, “Inuit and other northerners are already experiencing the direct impact of human-induced climate-change, and we face dramatic problems with possible social and cultural dislocation in coming years.”
The warmer weather has been blamed for a growing number of deaths in Nunavut, as hunters fall through ice that was once stable.
I imagine putting my foot into the icy waters and the sledge dragging me down to the bottom of the ocean. Not a good way to go.

Sledging It

It turns out that the park is Auyuittuq National Park (try pronouncing that after a drink or two) and the walk is a ten hour daily hike for 11 days dragging a sledge: 120 miles in total. I once did a 10 mile sponsored walk, but that was over 20 years ago. The farthest I walk these days is from the car to my house. I have never dragged a sledge in my life. I haven’t been skiing for ten years. And if I’m honest, I don’t like the cold.
The other problem with this ‘little walk in the park’ is the sleeping arrangements. There are no five star hotels in the Auyuittuk National Park. Instead, every night, the group ‘makes camp’ which means sharing a tent with a bunch of shattered strangers. This is where I have to own up. I am the most unlikely camper. Ever since having children I have made a point of never going on family camping holidays. My argument? A decent bed is all I want after running around after two active little ones all day. The last time I slept in a tent was at Glastonbury Festival in the mid-nineties when, as a music journalist, I had a backstage pass and an interview with Johnny Cash. I have a sneaking suspicion that camping in the Arctic will be a very different experience: there will be no mud, no veggie burgers and no portaloos

A Walk In The Park

I have been invited on a trip to Baffin Island.
I haven’t got a clue where it is.
“Where exactly is it?” I ask.
“An Arctic island off Canada. It’s just a little walk in the park. Why don’t you come along as the journalist?”
My immediate thought is, ‘Impossible. I have two young children – Joe, age 5, and Lara, age 9. The longest I have been away from them is for a weekend.’ I imagine my little boy’s face, creased up in tears, clinging to me at the airport, screaming, ‘Don’t Go, Mummy!’ My pre-teen daughter would no doubt stamp her foot in a strop, ‘It’s so unfair. Why do you get to go on holiday and we have to stay in this dump?’
Home is a Victorian house in Kingston-upon-Thames, Surrey, near Richmond Park. It is NOT a dump. Admittedly, our once quiet street has become a dumping ground for cars since residential parking was introduced in the adjacent roads - but that’s another matter altogether.

That night I dig out the atlas and look up Baffin Island. The only name I recognise near the Island is Greenland. I shiver just thinking about the place. I once interviewed Kari Herbert, daughter of polar explorer, Wally Herbert, about growing up in a hut in Greenland. Her family lived among Polar Inuit hunters in sub zero temperatures and she ate seal for tea. Would I see any seals on Baffin Island? And what, more importantly, do people eat on Baffin Island?